Shruti Sharma

How to be a despicable designer

If you’re a designer and you absolutely love your job, stop reading right now.

But, if you a designer who is a fan of the term ‘hot fixes’ and you roll your eyes at the mention of ‘iterations’, this blog is for you!

I know it’s frustrating when people just don’t get the art in your design. I know the tantrums, the bouts of criticism that clients throw at you all because the submit button was red, not green.

Bloody quibbler!

But you know what, forget it.

*sigh*

Don’t ever lose the feeling that you were put on this earth by the God of Design themselves. Users and designers don’t understand what it takes to build masterpieces.

How to be a despicable designer

So, let’s shine some light inside the mind of a despicable designer and try to look at the life from their perspective-

Screw the users and their problems

You should start practicing the mantra — a good designer always designs things for themselves. Period.

Users Moosers.

It shouldn’t even come into the picture. You should automatically assume the personas, it’s no big deal. You spent years studying this in school.

Just pretend that you understood their problems. Resist to frequent changes.

What people don’t understand is that you have already put your blood and sweat into the project. They will always ask for more. Because perfection is a state of mind. It will always be relative. They will try to throw into the vicious circle of ‘Design. Take Feedback. Repeat’.

Fall back. And charge with arrogance.

Repeat it after me- User knows nothing. They just don’t get it. They never will.

Copy your favorite designer’s work. Blindly.

Whether you are a pro or a beginner, someone will be always better than you. The world is full of them. I never understood this, what’s the big deal about copying work? Find your godfather designer and copy his/her ideas. It’s the right way to learn. How do you think great designers are made? They follow their idols.

If you are a newbie designer, you need to have an industry perspective. And for that, you need a person who has already been in the industry for long. So stalk his/her portfolio and binge copy his/her designs.

You need to do renovation before you start doing innovation, right?

Haters gonna hate!

Alignment is just a passing fad

Always remember- Design means decoration. What looks good, sells good. A good designer always draws what catches his attention. Alignment brings monotony into designs and the job of a good designer is to always bring in contrast.

So, throw elements randomly on the page. It would help the users spend quantity time (don’t worry about quality) on your pages thus making your application a success.

Consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds

As a designer, you should only believe in one kind of consistency — being Consistently Inconsistent. That would always keep the users on their toes. If the Call to Action button has been rendered green on one screen, make it red on the other. Give users a chance to learn new things on every screen. The more variety they encounter, the more they would swear by the freshness of your design ideas.

Keep your emotions at bay

Design fanatics will try to make you think about users. What do users want? Why they want what they want? You know things like user’s journey, user’s persona, user’s birthday, user’s pet’s name?

Go to hell, you want to yell! I know!

If you start thinking about all this, when will you design? Half of the times, even users don’t know what they want. They are fickle minded. You are the one with expertise and experience. You went to the college, studied sixteen hours every day, submitted research papers. Not them!

Elevate yourself from all your petty worries.


If you got the pun, then do the opposite.

If you didn’t, God help you.